Do you reach for your partner when things feel uncertain, then feel worse for needing to?
Anxious attachment is a pattern of wanting closeness and reassurance and finding it hard to settle when a partner seems distant. It is not a flaw and it is not a diagnosis. It is a pattern that was learned for good reasons, and it can change with understanding and practice.
This workbook is a practical guide to your own pattern. It combines short, clear explanations with reflective exercises you can type into on screen or print and write on by hand.
What you will work through
A 12 statement pattern check to help you notice how your pattern shows up
How your pattern was built, and your own relational blueprint
Pursuit and space, mapped step by step with a worked example
A trigger map and an exercise on reading your partner’s behaviour another way
The difference between care that comes from fullness and care that comes from fear
When caring becomes managing, and whose feelings belong to whom
Your space plan and a self support menu for the times your partner needs distance
A pause plan for moments of surge, and how to ask for what you need in requests rather than tests
Repair after a pursuit moment, your intentions and a four week tracker
A one page steadier ground plan to keep
Who it is for
Anyone who recognises themselves in the pull to check in, talk it through straight away or manage the mood of a relationship, whether you are single, dating, partnered or in a relationship with more than one person. It can be used on your own or alongside therapy.
About the author
Mark Ryan is a BACP Accredited Psychotherapist and NCPS Accredited Relationship Therapist, and the founder of Rise and Grow Therapy in London. His practice is fully affirming of LGBTQ+ people, and he works with relationships of every structure. The research referred to in the workbook comes from open access studies, and every reference is free to read online.
Details
Format is a fillable PDF, A4, 35 pages
Works on a computer or tablet, or print and write by hand
Instant digital download, no physical item is sent
For personal use only
Please note
This workbook is educational. It is not therapy and it is not a substitute for medical or psychological advice. The pattern check is a tool for reflection and is not a diagnostic or validated test. If anything in the workbook brings up distress that feels hard to manage, or if you feel afraid in your relationship, please see the support page near the end of the workbook.
If you would like to talk with someone about your relationship patterns, I offer a free 30 minute consultation, online or in person in London.
Do you reach for your partner when things feel uncertain, then feel worse for needing to?
Anxious attachment is a pattern of wanting closeness and reassurance and finding it hard to settle when a partner seems distant. It is not a flaw and it is not a diagnosis. It is a pattern that was learned for good reasons, and it can change with understanding and practice.
This workbook is a practical guide to your own pattern. It combines short, clear explanations with reflective exercises you can type into on screen or print and write on by hand.
What you will work through
A 12 statement pattern check to help you notice how your pattern shows up
How your pattern was built, and your own relational blueprint
Pursuit and space, mapped step by step with a worked example
A trigger map and an exercise on reading your partner’s behaviour another way
The difference between care that comes from fullness and care that comes from fear
When caring becomes managing, and whose feelings belong to whom
Your space plan and a self support menu for the times your partner needs distance
A pause plan for moments of surge, and how to ask for what you need in requests rather than tests
Repair after a pursuit moment, your intentions and a four week tracker
A one page steadier ground plan to keep
Who it is for
Anyone who recognises themselves in the pull to check in, talk it through straight away or manage the mood of a relationship, whether you are single, dating, partnered or in a relationship with more than one person. It can be used on your own or alongside therapy.
About the author
Mark Ryan is a BACP Accredited Psychotherapist and NCPS Accredited Relationship Therapist, and the founder of Rise and Grow Therapy in London. His practice is fully affirming of LGBTQ+ people, and he works with relationships of every structure. The research referred to in the workbook comes from open access studies, and every reference is free to read online.
Details
Format is a fillable PDF, A4, 35 pages
Works on a computer or tablet, or print and write by hand
Instant digital download, no physical item is sent
For personal use only
Please note
This workbook is educational. It is not therapy and it is not a substitute for medical or psychological advice. The pattern check is a tool for reflection and is not a diagnostic or validated test. If anything in the workbook brings up distress that feels hard to manage, or if you feel afraid in your relationship, please see the support page near the end of the workbook.
If you would like to talk with someone about your relationship patterns, I offer a free 30 minute consultation, online or in person in London.
