I'm Mark Ryan, a BACP Accredited Psychotherapist and NCPS Accredited Relationship Therapist working with couples, individuals, and polycules across London. This is where I write about the things that come up most often in the room. Jealousy. Coming out to a partner. Separation. Sex and intimacy. The ordinary arguments that usually aren't about what they first appear to be about.
Some of what's here is written for couples working through something together. Some of it is for one person trying to make sense of their own experience before bringing a partner into it. All of it is grounded in research and real clinical practice, not generic advice dressed up as insight.
Below, everything is grouped by topic if you're looking for something specific, or simply scroll through what's most recent. And if something here resonates, or you'd like support with what you're going through, I offer a free 30-minute consultation, in person in London or by video.
The Summer Slump: When the Relationship Feels Flat in Long Days
Long summer evenings can expose a flatness in a relationship that the rest of the year hides. A London therapist on what flatness means, and what it doesn't.
When Summer Exposes the Cracks: What to Do With What Comes Up
A difficult summer can surface things you had been managing not to see. A London relationship therapist on how to use post-summer clarity well.
Surviving the School Holidays as a Couple: Why Six Weeks Together Is Harder Than It Looks
Six weeks of school holidays is a stress test most couples don't expect. A London relationship therapist on why it strains things, and what helps.
How to Choose a Couples Therapist in London: A Practical Guide
A practical guide to choosing a couples therapist in London. Credentials, modality, fit, location, cost, and what to ask in a consultation.
Why couples argue about money (and what to do about it)
Money is the top predictor of relationship breakdown. A London relationship therapist explains why money arguments hit so hard, what UK couples are really fighting about, and what helps.
Couples Therapy Before Marriage: Should You Try It Before Getting Engaged or Married?
Should you try couples therapy before getting engaged or married? Mark Ryan, a London relationship therapist, explains what the research says and what premarital work involves.
Why doesn’t my partner listen to me? What the Research Says (and How to Fix It)
Feeling unheard in your relationship? A London couples therapist explains what the research actually says about listening, the demand-withdraw cycle, and how to get your partner to engage.
Why Do I Keep Ending Up in the Same Relationship? The Hidden Logic of Partner Choice
Different partners, same pattern? A London couples therapist explains the research on unconscious partner choice, the childhood blueprint behind it, and how the cycle can be broken.