Relationship advice & insights.
I'm Mark Ryan, a BACP Accredited Psychotherapist and NCPS Accredited Relationship Therapist working with relationships, couples, individuals, and polycules across London. This is where I write about the things that come up most often in the therapy room; jealousy, coming out to a partner, separation, sex and intimacy, and the ordinary arguments that usually aren't about what they first appear to be about.
Some of what's here is written for couples working through something together. Some of it is for one person trying to make sense of their own experience before bringing a partner into it. All of it is grounded in research and real clinical practice, not generic advice dressed up as insight.
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- Attachment 7
- Attachment and Patterns 2
- Communication 5
- Communication and conflict 8
- Consensual Non Monogamy 2
- Couples therapy London 91
- Emotional Abuse 4
- Ethical Non Monogamy 2
- Grief and Loss 1
- Infidelity & Betrayal 5
- Jealousy 3
- LGBT+ Therapy 19
- LGBTQ+ Couples 13
- Labels 4
- Mental Health and Wellbeing 20
- Money and Relationships 4
- Neurodiversity and Relationships 6
- Non-Monogamy and Open Relationships 5
- Parenting 8
- Polyamory 2
- Pre-Marital Therapy London 1
- Relationship Therapy London 1
- Relationship therapy London 88
- Separation and Divorce 9
- Sex and Intimacy 12
- Summer 4
- Trust and Repair 4
Contempt in Relationships and How to Turn It Around
Contempt in relationships, why it hurts, how it grows and what helps, for all couples and when to seek help.
Long Term Relationships After 60 and What Changes
Long term relationships after 60, from retirement and intimacy to loss, and how therapy can help with the challenges that come up.
Divorce After 50: What the Research Says About Grey Divorce
What research shows about divorce after 50, including the UK evidence, why the usual explanations fall short, and how couples can weigh separating.
Trying to Conceive and Supporting Each Other Through Uncertainty
The monthly cycle of hope and disappointment before any diagnosis or treatment, what research shows about couples trying to conceive, and how to support each other through it.
IVF and Your Relationship: What Couples Wish They'd Known
How IVF strains a relationship, what research shows about blame, sex and coping, and what helps.
Why Desire Fades in Long Term Relationships and What Helps
Desire often fades in long relationships, and it rarely means love has gone. This article explores why, and what helps closeness return.
Fertility Struggles and Their Impact on a Relationship
Why trying to conceive can put more strain on a relationship than almost anything else, what the research shows, and what tends to help.
Postpartum Depression and Relationships: Why Partner Support Matters So Much
What the research shows about partner support and postpartum depression, and why the support new mothers receive so often falls short.
Autism and Neurotypical Relationships: Bridging Different Communication Styles
Why communication breakdown between an autistic and non-autistic partner runs both ways, what the research shows, and what helps.
“Object Permanence” and ADHD. Why “Out of Sight, Out of Mind” Isn't Quite Right
Why the popular term for ADHD forgetfulness gets the science wrong, what's happening when a partner feels forgotten, and what helps.
Impulse Control, ADHD, and What It Means for a Relationship
Why ADHD-related impulsivity shows up in money, big decisions, and heated moments, what the research shows, and what helps a couple navigate it together.
Why Does My ADHD Partner Interrupt Me? Focus, Attention, and Feeling Unheard
Why interrupting is one of the most common ADHD-related complaints in relationships, what's happening in the brain when it does, and what helps.
Rejection Sensitivity in ADHD: Why Feedback Can Feel Like an Attack
Why ordinary feedback can land as a devastating personal attack for a partner with ADHD, what the research shows, and what helps.
ADHD and Relationships: When It Seems Like Your Partner Doesn't Care
Why ADHD so often gets mistaken for not caring in a relationship, what the research shows is happening instead, and what tends to help.
Miscarriage and Baby Loss: Supporting Each Other Through Grief
Why partners often grieve a miscarriage or baby loss differently, and what tends to help a couple stay connected through it rather than grow apart.
Polyamory and Mental Health: What the Research Shows
Why polyamorous people report higher rates of depression and anxiety, and why the research points to stigma rather than the relationship structure itself.
Relationship Anarchy. What It Is and Whether Therapy Has a Role
What relationship anarchy means, how it differs from polyamory, and whether couples therapy, built around a dyad, has anything useful to offer.
Opening a Relationship: What to Think About Before You Do
What the research says about why opening up works for some couples and not others, and the honest questions worth answering before you try.
Open Relationship vs Polyamory: What's the Difference
What separates an open relationship from polyamory, and what it costs a couple when the two get treated as interchangeable.
Why Couples Struggle When the Kids Go Back to School
Why September can feel harder on a relationship than the summer holidays were, and what the sudden quiet reveals.