Relationship advice & insights.
I'm Mark Ryan, a BACP Accredited Psychotherapist and NCPS Accredited Relationship Therapist working with relationships, couples, individuals, and polycules across London. This is where I write about the things that come up most often in the therapy room; jealousy, coming out to a partner, separation, sex and intimacy, and the ordinary arguments that usually aren't about what they first appear to be about.
Some of what's here is written for couples working through something together. Some of it is for one person trying to make sense of their own experience before bringing a partner into it. All of it is grounded in research and real clinical practice, not generic advice dressed up as insight.
Browse the archive.
Search by keyword, or filter by topic, to find the article you're looking for or browse the newest articles blelow.
- Attachment 7
- Attachment and Patterns 2
- Communication 5
- Communication and conflict 7
- Consensual Non Monogamy 2
- Couples therapy London 84
- Emotional Abuse 4
- Ethical Non Monogamy 2
- Grief and Loss 1
- Infidelity & Betrayal 5
- Jealousy 3
- LGBT+ Therapy 19
- LGBTQ+ Couples 13
- Labels 4
- Mental Health and Wellbeing 20
- Money and Relationships 4
- Neurodiversity and Relationships 6
- Non-Monogamy and Open Relationships 5
- Parenting 6
- Polyamory 2
- Pre-Marital Therapy London 1
- Relationship Therapy London 1
- Relationship therapy London 82
- Separation and Divorce 7
- Sex and Intimacy 11
- Summer 4
- Trust and Repair 4
Fertility Struggles and Their Impact on a Relationship
Why trying to conceive can put more strain on a relationship than almost anything else, what the research shows, and what tends to help.
Postpartum Depression and Relationships: Why Partner Support Matters So Much
What the research shows about partner support and postpartum depression, and why the support new mothers receive so often falls short.
Autism and Neurotypical Relationships: Bridging Different Communication Styles
Why communication breakdown between an autistic and non-autistic partner runs both ways, what the research shows, and what helps.
“Object Permanence” and ADHD: Why “Out of Sight, Out of Mind” Isn't Quite Right
Why the popular term for ADHD forgetfulness gets the science wrong, what's happening when a partner feels forgotten, and what helps.
Impulse Control and ADHD: What It Means for a Relationship
Why ADHD-related impulsivity shows up in money, big decisions, and heated moments, what the research shows, and what helps a couple navigate it together.
Why Does My ADHD Partner Interrupt Me? Focus, Attention, and Feeling Unheard
Why interrupting is one of the most common ADHD-related complaints in relationships, what's happening in the brain when it does, and what helps.
Rejection Sensitivity in ADHD: Why Feedback Can Feel Like an Attack
Why ordinary feedback can land as a devastating personal attack for a partner with ADHD, what the research shows, and what helps.
ADHD and Relationships: When It Seems Like Your Partner Doesn't Care
Why ADHD so often gets mistaken for not caring in a relationship, what the research shows is happening instead, and what tends to help.
Miscarriage and Baby Loss: Supporting Each Other Through Grief
Why partners often grieve a miscarriage or baby loss differently, and what tends to help a couple stay connected through it rather than grow apart.
Polyamory and Mental Health: What the Research Shows
Why polyamorous people report higher rates of depression and anxiety, and why the research points to stigma rather than the relationship structure itself.
Relationship Anarchy: What It Is and Whether Therapy Has a Role
What relationship anarchy means, how it differs from polyamory, and whether couples therapy, built around a dyad, has anything useful to offer.
Opening a Relationship: What to Think About Before You Do
What the research says about why opening up works for some couples and not others, and the honest questions worth answering before you try.
Open Relationship vs Polyamory: What's the Difference
What separates an open relationship from polyamory, and what it costs a couple when the two get treated as interchangeable.
Why Couples Struggle When the Kids Go Back to School
Why September can feel harder on a relationship than the summer holidays were, and what the sudden quiet reveals.
Sex Addiction: What the Term Means and What Helps
What sex addiction describes, why a high sex drive isn't the same thing, and what tends to help when compulsive sexual behaviour is affecting a relationship.
Narcissistic Abuse: Understanding the Cycle and Its Impact
The repeating pattern behind narcissistic abuse, idealisation, devaluation, discard, and why it's so hard to leave.
Am I in a Relationship With a Covert Narcissist? The Manipulation Tactics That Are Hard to See
Why covert narcissistic manipulation is so difficult to name while it's happening, the specific patterns to recognise, and what tends to help.
Is My Ex Just Anxious? What Social Media Gets Wrong
Why calling an ex anxious can be a way of avoiding a harder question, what it costs you, and how to look honestly at what happened instead.
Is My Ex Just Avoidant? What Social Media Gets Wrong
Why avoidant has become the internet's favourite villain label, what it costs you to reach for it, and what a more honest account of the relationship looks like. A London relationship therapist explains.
Is My Ex a Narcissist? What Social Media Gets Wrong
Why the narcissist label feels so satisfying after a breakup, what it costs you, and how to look honestly at what happened instead. A London relationship therapist explains.